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08 February 1979 @ 02:11 pm
 
Work is dull, as per usual, but it’s especially dull after a weekend full of drunken carousing. Unfortunately, none of my esteemed customers are content to let me wallow in these doldrums properly. They all insist on loitering around the counter and boring me with Quidditch talk. I now loathe Quidditch fans even more, which I honestly didn’t think was possible. My own capacity for complete and utter revulsion is a constant surprise.

I also didn’t realise that Quidditch supplies could be trussed up for Valentines Day. Rest assured, though, they can. Actually, the whole Alley is looking appropriately tarty. It’s as if an army of fourteen-year-old girls swept in during the night and vomited pink streamers and cheap heart cutouts everywhere. There is an overabundance of cheap chocolate, though, which is tolerable (that reminds me, I ought to send Patty some so she doesn’t end up feeling depressed).

Lastly, my flatmate left for Aruba this morning. I don’t know why (it’s a bloody mystery, actually. What the fuck do matronly old witches need in Aruba?) but I do know that I will be spreading out my star charts tonight and no one will be around to whinge about it. Ha ha.
 
 
 
Marlene McKinnon: caught off guard.anticlaw on September 8th, 2007 10:00 pm (UTC)
Shite.
mundungus h fletcher: holding the good shitdunged on September 8th, 2007 11:08 pm (UTC)
shite what, jesus fuck I'd never harvest your organs...unless it was your heart
Marlene McKinnon: caught off guard.anticlaw on September 8th, 2007 11:21 pm (UTC)
I just can't believe you actually

Oh, that was just bad.
mundungus h fletcher: holding the good shitdunged on September 8th, 2007 11:22 pm (UTC)
or your tits, either way
Marlene McKinnon: sarcasm is imminent.anticlaw on September 8th, 2007 11:24 pm (UTC)
I don't think tits count as organs, Fletcher.
mundungus h fletcher: holding the good shitdunged on September 8th, 2007 11:26 pm (UTC)
I'm the fucking expert on the subject, love

hey so your flat
Marlene McKinnon: cleans up well.anticlaw on September 8th, 2007 11:30 pm (UTC)
Do you really think I'm going to let you come and camp out in my flatmate's room? She fucking embroiders things. I doubt you could even survive in there.
mundungus h fletcher: holding the good shitdunged on September 8th, 2007 11:38 pm (UTC)
why hello miss twat it doesn't have to be her room, I'm fucking short I fit under tables, on couches, and I'm sure you have a room too
Marlene McKinnon: oh damn.anticlaw on September 8th, 2007 11:41 pm (UTC)
Oh, bugger it.

How long do you need a couch?
mundungus h fletcher: holding the good shitdunged on September 8th, 2007 11:44 pm (UTC)
oh you are the most lovely bird to ever cross my path, there is much in fucking store for tonight, also does your flatmate collect anything

rest of my fucking life, how long's your saggy friend gone for
Marlene McKinnon: marlene watches from the wall.anticlaw on September 8th, 2007 11:47 pm (UTC)
No, and THERE ARE RULES. If you don't follow them I will kick your arse, or enlist someone else to kick your arse. Either way, you're getting your arse kicked.

A week.
mundungus h fletcher: holding the good shitdunged on September 8th, 2007 11:51 pm (UTC)
fine fine I'll follow your fucking rules you fascist twat BUT A LOVELY FASCIST TWAT MIND YOU, what are the rules

oh you are such a right fucking angel, we'll see if it lasts that long
Marlene McKinnon: sarcasm is imminent.anticlaw on September 8th, 2007 11:54 pm (UTC)
1. Do not steal shite from the flat.
2. Do not break shite from the flat.
3. If I find you in my bed at any time I will fucking kill you, so stay out.
4. When you think you've washed your hands too many times, DO IT AGAIN.

I guess we will.
mundungus h fletcher: holding the good shitdunged on September 9th, 2007 12:02 am (UTC)
oh hey sure right definitely yeah rules are rules ect

apparating over in about an hour yeah? got sales to make first, also ransacking my mum's house cos she's on holiday it's going to be fucking amazing you can come if you want, wear a mask
Marlene McKinnon: marlene watches from the wall.anticlaw on September 9th, 2007 12:04 am (UTC)
No, thanks. I have to batten down the hatches.
mundungus h fletcher: holding the good shitdunged on September 9th, 2007 12:05 am (UTC)
I'd worry about battening down your own hatches ha ha ha

OH MAN I'M SO FUCKING HAPPY THIS IS GOING TO BE GREAT
mundungus h fletcher: holding the good shitdunged on September 8th, 2007 11:53 pm (UTC)
also is there wrestling involved in that arse kicking because if so I am so fucking there
Marlene McKinnon: caught off guard.anticlaw on September 8th, 2007 11:55 pm (UTC)
No. This not fun arse kicking!
mundungus h fletcher: holding the good shitdunged on September 8th, 2007 11:41 pm (UTC)
look I'm not a gay sleep humper like Fagian, Bones even told me once that I'm rather fucking snuggly, like a teddy even
Marlene McKinnon: sarcasm is imminent.anticlaw on September 8th, 2007 11:42 pm (UTC)
Stop now before I vomit. You're not staying in my bed.
mundungus h fletcher: i don't fucking caredunged on September 8th, 2007 11:44 pm (UTC)
we'll see
Marlene McKinnon: caught off guard.anticlaw on September 8th, 2007 11:45 pm (UTC)
I CAN STILL CHANGE MY MIND.
mundungus h fletcher: holding the good shitdunged on September 8th, 2007 11:46 pm (UTC)
but why would you? like a teddy, McKinnon, a fucking teddy
Marlene McKinnon: sarcasm is imminent.anticlaw on September 8th, 2007 11:48 pm (UTC)
Merlin help the children of the world.